Queerly Beloved

I guess if you truly need a day to remind yourself to be thankful for your life that you're not really that thankful of these things on a day-to-day basis. I, certainly, am guilty as charged. Looking back over the past year, I've done a lot of whining, bitching, moaning, complaining, and the like. I forget how good I have it. I live in a developed society. I have lots of rights. I have a warm bed to sleep in. I have a wonderful family. I have some really good friends...and am making some new ones to replace those that weren't maybe so good.

I have a very fortunate to have the life I do. It's not easy, but that being said, life is never easy. I don't have a free ride, nor should I. 

Things I'm Very Thankful For:

• My friends -- those of you who put up with my crazy antics, will let me vent anytime night or day, and have been there for me when I really need it, you're all really amazing.
• My family -- when it comes down to it, you are the ones I rely on, especially my parents. I owe you more than my life, definitely more than I could ever pay back.
• The first sip of coffee in the morning.
• Mary Poppins
• Laughing
• Sneezing
• Cosmopolitans
• Facebook
• Musical Theatre
• Pumpkin Cheesecake
• Post-examination boredom
• Fresh sheets
• Sunny afternoons
• Sunday afternoon naps in a sunbeam
• Bonuses
• Bubble Baths
• A good book
• Grooving to good tunes

The question remains, how do I get myself to the point where I don't have to sit here and scratch my noggin to realize these joys. The joy in my life needs to be present on regular basis. I'm trying to re-organize my priorities. I've realized that I just cannot neglect my social life. Without spending time with friends on a day to day and week to week basis, I'm going to continue to be miserable. This weekend I packed way too many social outings into a small period of time. Balance is key, I suppose.

Fall is here!

BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!

I'm done.

I just got back from Music in the Park where I sat reading Rushdie while listening to some Funk. It was awesome and relaxing. :)

I'm only awake because in an hour I have to be at work. That's okay with me, at this point -- my house is a whopping 28 degrees right now. I've discovered that my furnace fan that could circulate cool air is busted, and thus my air conditioning does no good. So I'm chilling as best I can in the basement...so why not go to work?!

I'm having kind of a moment, but I'm dealing with it positively, I think. That is to say I'm dealing well, except when I start listening to shmaltzy, romantic songs that are filled with idealistic and unrealistic ideas about how life works. Such as right now...

*Shrug* Eat your heart out, Karen Carpenter. *Shrug*

So, yesterday was an interesting day. Closing Friday night sucked...anything that could have gone wrong did. The debit machines for til 5 and til 1 stopped working so my cashier and I were moving over to the middle island to use that machine, I forgot to turn RTR on when I did my read, the most important keys had disappeared from the store. Not only all that, but I couldn't get a hold of anyone. It was terrible. Then I forgot a bunch of stuff in my panic/frustration. Anyway, Saturday closing was much easier. :) *sigh of relief*

Anyway, the point of the story is that I was not looking forward to arriving at work. I arrived and right away was pounced on. It was let slide because I had done everything that I could have...*Shrug*. So anyway, then there was a bunch of shit going on that morning that was a rain cloud over the store. Also, she tells me there was a guy in that morning looking for me. Greeeeeeeeeeeeeeat. Turns out it was just Gary...who came to invite me to a party on Canada Day. I turned him down, but agreed to hang out Wednesday night.  *more shrugs*

I'm definitely having a Laverne and Shirley moment over here.

Speaking of which it's time I get my Laverne-ass in gear and get to work!

I set my alarm for seven with the intention of getting up and going to school with enough time to actually do some review for this exam. Two problems: first I couldn't fall asleep last night, secondly I'm just too tired to care this morning.

Oh wells...another four hours (maximum) and this semester will be officially over for me.

FUCK YEAH.

Snow? Bullshit.

Song: Dreamgirls (Finale)

So, hey everybody, in case you hadn't noticed, it is already March the 1st! Wasn't New Year's Eve like yesterday?! Holy sweet merciful crap! I can't believe how quickly this year is flying by! I guess that's not a bad thing, but seriously. Times flies when life is happening to you, don't it?! I've been so caught up with work and school the last few weeks that it's been a little ridiculous. I know I've been somewhat hard to get  hold of, and I can't say that it's going to get easier anytime soon, but don't hesitate in trying to get a hold of me. :)

Song: I Only Wanna Be With You, Vonda Shepard

Well, speaking of which...Alex is coming to visit from Vancouver. He's getting in tonight after work, which is cool. It's going to be a painfully quick visit, me thinks. I can't afford to skip class this week, partially because I'm behind, partially because I skipped all but one of my Wednesday classes in February, and partially because I have a quiz in my first class on Monday! Booo!

It's better than waiting until the end of the month when we are getting together for a weekend to go see Margaret Cho! Yay! MARGARET CHO!!!!!

Song: Feeling Good, Michael Buble

Stripper music makes me horny. Okay, not really, but it does make me want to do a strip tease of sorts. More on that later, possibly. The point of this reference is that I need to be getting ready for work, but I'm not. Oh wells. I just don't feel like getting to it yet. It's just not in me. I'm pooped. I slept really well again last night, with the help of Benelyn pills, which apparently get me really fucked up, but I'm still recovering from the cold I've had this week.

My hand really hurts from when I fell up an embankment I was trying to scramble up and clawed my way back down. :( What crazy adventure will I go on next? Hmmm, perhaps I shall scale Mount Everest in stiletto heels! Sounds like a good plan to me: "Oh great, that's just what this country needs -- a cock, in a frock, on a rock!" (Priscilla, 1994).

Song: Stop in the name of Love, The Supremes

Who can turn away Diana Ross first thing in the morning. I'm two seconds away from grabbing my straightening iron (seeing as how I don't have a curling iron) and dawning some heels and...well, let's just leave it at that, shall we? I'm in a weird, giddy mood today. I think I like it. It feels more natural than being a gloomy pussy all the time. [If anyone can catch the pop-culture reference, I'll be most pleased!!]

*dance break*

Song:  I Love the Lord, Whitney Houston (The Preacher's Wife, 1996)

Fuck me, I don't care what anyone (particularly Alex and Matt) say, I LOVE WHITNEY HOUSTON. She's friggin' amazing. Like, for reals, yo!
'Nuff said.

This is what church music should be like, filled with great amounts of soul, a rock band and symphony combined, with greats amounts of gospel choir, and soloist. It makes my spirit soar, even if it is maybe the teensiest bit full of shlock!

Song: Big Girls Don't Cry, Fergie

I'm sorry, but once again I'm going to have to admit that this is an incredibly guilty pleasure. You know me, though, there's a break-up behind it. This is one of the songs that helped me get over Gary. Although, I'm not sure why -- I had very little empowerment, if any, that resulted from our breakup, it was completely in his time, in his way. I got no closure. I did cry. Whatever.

Other songs influential in re-gaining myself? Before He Cheats, Carrie Underwood and Do you Know, Enrique Eglasias. Yeah, whatever...it's a good song, if you only give it a chance. To that end, you should have seen me at work when it came on a couple weeks ago...let's just say if Sam still worked for us, she'd really have had a problem with me acting "gay".

Anyway, it's time to get my shit together.

I've cleaned up my friends list from people that I have no idea who they are...or never post...or whatever. So if it's you and you think it's a mistake, lemme know.

I slept in. I went to lunch. I've taken a nap.

I have not done enough homework today.

How many songs total: 1431
How many hours or days of music: 3.7 days
Most recently played: Our Children, Ragtime
Most played: Top 24 songs? All from Dreamgirls! 25? "Everything", Michael Buble
Most recently added: Tosca, Pucinni

Sort by song title:
First Song: "Abie Baby/ Fourscore, Hair
Last Song: "38 Years Old", The Tragically Hip

Sort by time:
Shortest Song: Recitative (Uriel), The Creation (Haydn) (0:17)
Longest Song: The Phantom of the Opera, Act 1: Scenes 1-10 (54:09)

Sort by album:
First album: Barry White's All Time Greatest Hits
Last album: 13 Going on 30

First song that comes up on Shuffle: Borderline, Madonna

Search the following and state how many songs come up:

Death - 1
Life - 15
Love - 97
Hate – 1
You - 167
Sex – 0

"I Believe In You and Me
I Believe That we will be
In love eternally
Well as far as I can see
You Will Always be the one
For me (Oh yes, you will)

And I believe in dreams again
I believe that love will never end
And like the river finds the sea
I was lost, now I'm free
Cuz I believe In you and me

I will never leave your side
I will never hurt your pride
When all the chips are down, baby
Then I will always be around
Just to be right where you are
My love, you know I love you, boy

I will never leave you out
I will always let you in, boy (mmm, oh baby)
To places no-one's ever been,
Deep inside, can't you see?
That I believe in you and me

Maybe I'm a fool
To feel the way I do
I will play the fool forever
Just to be with you forever

I believe in miracles
And love is the miracle
And yes, baby you're my dream come true
I was lost, now I'm free,
Oh, baby cuz i believe, i do believe, in you and me
See, I was lost, now I'm free
Cuz I believe in you and me."

Not only did I get flowers again, but my honey just walked into my bedroom.

I've said it before and I'll say it again, "what a lucky boy, am I."

I'm going to finish Tom Sawyer before sleep if it kills me.

Hey there,

Well, I was perusing what I had written thinking that I had already discussed my holidays here. I am slightly shocked and dismayed to discover that my posting has been incredibly sparse. Although, I must admit, not that shocked being that my parents have dialup and the time I have spent at home has been so brief. Anyway, with all that in mind I should get to it.

So, I got off work early last Saturday, hung out with Manda, and then went home. Upon my arrival there I began to pack and wrap presents until almost one in the morning. I then went to bed, finally drifting off to sleep about 2am. My alarm rang a mere four hours later, in time to get me out of town about 7:30. I'm glad I left when I did, for as I was leaving Kamloops it began to snow. Pretty soon I couldn't see the lines on the road, where I was supposed to drive, or where the road (including the shoulder) ended and the cliffs began. Not pretty. So I got as far as Savona where the roads finally improved.

I arrived in Lac La Hache many hours later...seriously, the longest drive of my life, about five minutes before church was to start. I walked in the door, the organist wished me a good morning, my mother stood up and screamed. Talk about a reaction. Church was okay...then we went home and chilled out most of the afternoon and evening.

Christmas Eve saw my dad and I go into town, grab some lunch, some groceries, some liquories, and the like. it was cool to spend some time together, one on one. The cashier at Safeway used to work with me at VV, so it was nice seeing her. Then we went home and chilled out  Christmas Eve service was okay. I was feeling a little out of wack for various reasons, but all in all enjoyed the experience. As per the McNeil-children-tradition, Rachael and I escaped right away and came home. We changed into pj's and started putting together our food. A cheese/meat/cracker type plate, several varieties of baked goods. We played a bunch of games of Euchre, then hit the hay.

Christmas morning I got up about seven, stoked the fire (which I was sleeping next to), made coffee and clafouti, and woke everyone up. We did stockings, ate the clafouti, and then did presents. I got really nice stuff from my family: a crockpot, cushions, pillows, a sheet set, a lamp, etc.,etc. My family seemed pretty tickled with the gifts I got them. Rachael has already devoured one of the books I bought her, and possibly the other as well. My mom was pretty stoked with the stuff, as she was with dad's blazer. (I believe I may have said "Dad's gettin' laid tonight" after seeing her reaction.)

After that we lazed for a while until mom and I started the turkey around 1:30. Okay, so I started the turkey and mom wandered into the kitchen and offered to help. We got the turkey into the oven around two, and wandered away until about five when i started getting all the side dishes ready. It came out great. Mmmm, I'm a good cook. We had a delightful dinner. It was absolutely terrific. We also decided to waive dessert off for a few hours. Those few hours turned into a week...we're saving the Christmas pudding until tommorow (they're bringing it down with them after church tommorow!!!!)

Rachael and I came home to Kamloops on Boxing Day, because I had to work that afternoon. DEAD as a doornail. The drive up was much better than the ride down. So, I came home that night and we hung out while i cleaned and tidied my place up a bit. Then I got up and went to work again, when I came home early again, and we ditzed around. All the while I've been stressing over finding a ride home from Kelowna on NY's...which we finally resolved with the decision that i would take the night bus up to LLH and drive one of my parents' cars to Kamloops and to Kelowna.

Complete gong show. Seriously. The bus was supposed to leave Kamloops at 10:40. It was then supposed to arrive at 11:10. It finally arrived 11:30. Re-boarded the passengers after fueling up about 11:45. Left Kamloops around midnight. Luckily they decided that the bus I got on was going to go north, instead of us having to wait until the morning bus to leave Cache Creek. I arrived in Lac La Hache at 3:30am. Suffice to say that once i got there, I couldn't sleep.

I left LLH the next morning around 11:15. It took me until 2pm to get home. I don't understand this! It never took so long before. Perhaps I'm just a better driver now. Who knows? Tim and Nina arrived with Logan in tow around 7. We hung out a bit and decided where to eat. We then decided we were going to come to Kelowna last night. We left town around 9:15 and arrived here around 11:30. We went to bed around 12:15 or so.

We chilled out here most of the day. I took Nina and Rachael grocery shopping this morning and went with Walmart with Tim this afternoon. It's been nice just chillin' and spendin' time with my peeps, especially the newest peep, L-Dawg. :-D Love that little guy SO much.

Anyway, yeah, that's about it.

Okay, no it's not. I'm going home to Kamloops Monday. Yay! I can't wait to spend several consecutive nights in my own bed. It shall be glorious for multitudes of reasons. The foremost being that in the last week I've spent five nights on a couch, with two more coming my way.

Anyways, Merry ho-ho, and Happy New Year!!!!

The irritating voice of Doug Collins is the second thing I've heard this morning. Luckily for me the first thing was not him. Gad, he's awful. *yaaaawn*

I'm tired...and yet, I work up at least half an hour before my alarm. I need to get my ass out of bed to go run some errands. I was goign to go grocery shopping last night, but the grocery stores were closed. Who knew?

My break is almost half over, I can't believe.

Have a good one, yo.

Wow, what an eventful week it's been. It's been so delicious and wonderful that I have, on several occasions, pinched myself to make sure that I'm not dreaming. It's been a long week as well, in some ways, but with a just reward at the end of it, I'd say. Although, looking outside my window seeing clouds of snow dancing on the cold morning wind is making me really nervous. I am hopping on a bus at 1:30am and the only thing besides wild horses and natural disasters that could stop me is snow on the Coquillhalla Highway.

So yeah, I'm going down to Vancouver! I'm going to apologize to those people whom I'm sure to shamefully neglect whilst I am there. I am terrified of transit when I don't know where I'm going, so I'm prolly going to stick very close to my host. :) Next time, and trust me ladies and gentlemen, my loyal livejournal readers, there IS going to be a next time. It'll be next year, but that's coming really soon. Mmmmm!

NY's, it seems my plans have changed. My PTO @ work is in jeopardy because of recent staffing changes. Two cashiers and a supervisor have quit or given notice. We're running on a bare bones staff at the moment, so this indeed, is a bad thing. One of the cashiers is off on a European adventure...and she will be missed: a hard worker, a good friend, and a really cool person. The other cashier got a different job; I can't say that I'm less than pleased. I like her as a person, but since her absenteeism and professionalism began to grate on me, I just couldn't do it anymore. It's really hard to work with someone who DOESN'T work.

Anyway, so NY's may not be spent in Kelowna with the family, as previously planned. I think I'll be able to spend the first half of that week off there, and work a bunch the last part, which will be nice for the money, but not nice for the working. Oh well, I'm trying to be supportive to the people on the lower rungs of  the ladder who won't have as much time off in the season as I suspect I'm getting.

Annnnnnnyway, I'll let you Kamloopsian folks know what the plans are for that auspicious occasion in case you might want to participate.

My Christmas party is right after my shift today, so I've dressed for the occasion now. I'm being a big queen today, it's slightly ridiculous. I'm wearing a nice stripey, but funky shirt. It's kind of hip-hop. LOL. It's white with black and frey stipes and then has like painted doodles all over it...really funky. I'm wearing a maroon tshirt under it. Then I'm wearing light blue faded jeans which are too long for me.....and I'm doing it again. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, that's right. I'm wearing my bitch boots. It's funny that these pants are still too long when I'm wearing these babies.

My feet are going to be dead by the end of today, I know it. lol. My feet already kind of hurt and they've been in them for maybe twenty minutes. Oh well, they're the only hot shoes I have that are water, and thus snow proof. It's festive and fun.

Hungering. Hmmmm...maybe I'll go eat a banana.

I couldn't sleep last night. Part of the problem was the I felt NASTY after eating Quizno's for dinner last night. I walked around work like a zombie and feeling like I was going to woof my cookies. It was awful. They sent me home early, Thank Jebas, and I crawled into bed where I chatted and surfed for a few hours before going to bed. Then it happened, I didn't want to go to bed. :( It was a sad state of affairs.

I'm still feeling pretty raunchy (and not in the good way) today. My stomach feels very upset with me. I can't say that I blame him. I've been feeding him crap and more crap lately. Time to cut back on coffee, pizza, and curry. Oh, and now hazelnuts. Ugh. Not pretty, people.

So yeah! I hope I start feeling better. I think I'm going to have an early night tonight. I get off work at 6, am going to find out if the salon I'm buying a gc for my boss is still open, if it is I might trek over there and buy it today, otherwise tommorow during the day I'll have something to do. Then I'll come home, crawl into pjs, and throw on a movie with the intent of a really good nights' sleep. Mmmmm.

Have a good day all.

So hey there sports fans. What's new in Paddy land? Well, let me tell you, not a lot.

I've got my first final mark back, an A-. That's not too shabby, especially when you factor in the shittiness of this entire semester. Yeah. I'm pretyy stoked for that. This was in my Advanced Composition class. So I'm feeling pretty jazzed about that. I don't know where I want to take the english degree I'm stuck taking, composition, literature, of a classical or contemporary. I'm thinking contemporary. I've studied Shakespeare a little and while I like and appreciate it, I don't love it. Thoughts.

Beauty and the Beast was fucking amazing. Like, man. It made me think a lot about what I'm doing with my life. Why english? Because it's something I fell into, whereas music is something I've fallen out of. I was really sure that I wanted to go back to music, but it's just not going to work. I've spent too long in school and have too many credits accumulated to have the majority of them transfered. So I'm sticking it out for now. We'll see what I need to do. I don't know.

I'm really enjoying my lifestyle. I'm working the same amount of hours I was during school. The difference being, of course, that I don't have any classes or homework to do right now. Awesome stuff, in my opinion. I'm sleeping a lot, hanging out at home in my pajamas and working short evening shifts. Lovely.

Money is stressing me out as usual. I just received word that they've raised the Strata fees as of January 1st. Greeeeeeeeat. As if I had any more fat to trim. I don't, just so you know. My cell phone was finally turned off yesterday. They wouldn't turn it off for a month. So I just started cold turkey at not using it. I think I made three class and texted a couple of times. Now I can't! le sigh!

As much as money *IS* stressing me out, I'm doing something for me. I've met this gentleman in Vancouver, whom I'm very smitten with, and I'm taking the bus down to see him this weekend. And by weekend, I clearly mean Saturday night or Sunday morning. I either leave at 1:30 or 6 am. I'm thinking 1:30 am gives me that much more time with him. lol. I'm a suck. He's pretty amazing. Yeah, we have so much in common. He's in school studying Business Administration and in the process of becoming ordinained within the Anglican Church. He's funny and sweet and perverted, just like me.

Yeah. So I'm pretty stoked for that right now. I need to remember not to put the cart before the horse though. That would just be nonsensical, no?

So yeah. That's my life right now.

Oh yeah, I have a couple of creative endeavours going at the moment. I'm knitting a scarf. If it turns out well, I'm giving it away as a Christmas present, probably to my brother. I don't have the money to invest in anything else. lol. So yeah, I'm kind of stoked about that. It's really enjoyable and relaxing, I find. The other is I'm writing a story for myself, not for a class. I'm pretty stoked about it. I only just started it yesterday and it's very much still in rough, first stages, but as I said, pretty excited for it! Woooooot!!!

So yeah. My life, in a nutshell.

      As the title to which this entry is referenced (huh?) I am done another semester!!! Yay! I'm so friggin' happy that it's all done with. My final today went well, I think. Better than the mid-term at any rate. Excellent. Anyway, yes. I'm done. I think I'm looking at a B+/A- on my English 308 (Advanced Composition: Personal Expression). I have no idea for the other two classes. In sociology I did really well on all my assignments and presentations, just passed the mid-term, and have no idea how I actually did on the final, therefore a great big question mark. In my creative writing class I got 12.5 and 13.5 on my smaller stories, no idea on what I got for the presentation, finished my morning pages (10% of final grade), and no idea on my final story mark. So, not good, methinks. At any rate, as long as I pass I will be happy.

     I sold back most of my books today. I kept one on principle and one they wouldn't buy back. I spent all the money on books they had in for next semester. Yeah. I'm trying to get all that done before Christmas. I want to have my English texts all read before January 7th when classes resume. I figure that way I can focus on actually doing readings for my poli-sci and philosophy classes. [Unlike my readings for say, sociology this term...] Yes, I have big plans. I want next semester to not suck ass (in the un-good way) so unlike this one.

     So I went to school this morning, wrote my exam, sold back my books, bought my new ones. Since I had half an hour to kill before picking up my documentation project, and there was almost no one in the CAC, I sat down at the piano and played for half an hour. It was really nice to play somewhere other then home. A couple people came up and complimented me on my playing. Nice to get some feedback. I guess church music is accessible to all, even if they don't know it.

    I'm home now, and don't want to go to work. lol. It's so freakin' cold out.